I woke up at 7:20 today—February 1, first day of my new yoga & writing regimen—with a sleeping Aidan in my arms.
He’d asked to come into our bed at about 2 and I told him no way, but he was screaming for me again at 5. Both Harlan and I hollered through the wall that he couldn’t come into our bed til morning, but he came tiptoeing through the darkness anyway—the rare, late-night act of defiance—and climbed right between us.
I’d planned to do the 8:15 yoga class with Dan at my gym.
I crept quietly out of bed and was getting myself dressed when Harlan screamed up the stairs, “Time to get up, guys!” Aidan woke up in grumpy spirits and scolded Harlan for bossing him around. In Aidan’s world, only mommy’s allowed to wake him from sleep and then only gently and sweetly. I dressed Aidan, we had breakfast, Aidan tried to convince us that he should stay home from school because his tummy hurt. I took his temperature just in case, declared him fit for school, and Harlan helped him get his coat and shoes on.
By the time I was ready to walk, it was 8:13.
“I’m late, guys,” I said. “Gotta go!”
I moved to tear out the door without them, but couldn’t bring myself to do it. We’d planned to walk to the gym together and then they’d go on to the bus or subway without me and Harlan would take Aidan to school and I couldn’t bring myself to dash off, leaving a certainly sad Aidan behind me.
As Harlan and I rushed up Allen Street toward Mass Ave, Aidan dawdled behind us.
“Wait up!” he said. I slowed down and took his hand for the rest of the walk.
I was only about five minutes late to class, but I still had to laugh at myself and the bold declaration of independence I made only yesterday when I wrote about putting myself and my yoga practice first this month.
Just couldn’t leave that soft little hand dangling.
The class was perfect (even though, ironically, it was in this class that I probably sustained the neck and shoulder injury/nerve damage that has made my arm and hand tingle and sent me into physical therapy for the last several months). It was challenging and sweaty, but also involved holding poses and digging deep into my tight hips, which was rougher than usual since I did spin class on Monday and bosu challenge yesterday.
It was a good start.
Afterwards, I steamed, soaked and showered, picked up Harlan’s special tea from the health food store, ran by my house to check email and have a snack (cottage cheese), spent nearly 45 minutes renewing our parking permit at the Cambridge parking office (something irritating that needed to be done), and now I’m planted in front of my computer at the library, my new favorite place to work.
I’m so excited about this thing, I might have to be a little bit naughty and go shopping in Harvard Square before I pick up Aidan from school. I really want to get some warm, comfy sweaters and still haven’t found that perfect pair of ankle boots.
I’ve done alright today and think I deserve it. Even if I am still putting my family first.